WHOAH!!!

Holy crap this still exists?!?!?! I thought I dreamt it up!! Oh well I guess I better start making posts again!!…..as of…….TOMORROW

Moms Only Sucka!

I’d be lying if I said this story didn’t piss me off. For those unfamiliar with what I’m talking about, some dad in Santa Rosa tried to join a “Sonoma County Moms” internet forum and was flamed for it. Who knew moms could be so mean?

I guess it’s been a safe haven for people with vaginas and sore teets to talk about “issues”, schedule play dates and bitch about men. Now God FORBID a man wanted to infiltrate it ?! Personally I wouldn’t want to post in a place any LESS than this sewage tank. Nonetheless, this guy shouldn’t have been ridiculed by the moms for wanting to communicate with other stay at home parents. Oh poor you! Getting to sit at home on your fat ass, raise your children and fantasize about the pool boy while your husband supports you. And now this penis monster wants to talk baby food and parenting with you….whaaaaaaaaaaaah. Go get a latte and shut the fuck up.

As far as the dude goes, I have no idea why he would even WANT to join these miserable beings, but to each his own. Here’s a tip buddy, go join menarebetterthanwomen.com . Hell, even they allow women to join. Maybe the mom nazis could do the same, but then again that would be too fair and practical.

Multi-Slouchin’

Wow I’d like to say I’ve been busy doin’ stuff but I can’t lie to my loyal readers. I could have updated many times in the past couple of weeks, but I just found other shit to do. Not that there were a lack of topics.

We had Cinco De Mayo, the 1,019th immigration rally, Sebastopol City Council “scandal” etc. etc. etc. I just wasn’t on the ball. And for that people I apologize.

I will ATTEMPT to stop slothing it up and bring some insight to subjects as I should.

On that note, I got somethin’ to do so I’ll hafta tackle this whole blog debacle later =)

Slow News For Slow People

I know I give the Press Democrap a hard time alot….But can you blame me when shit like this happens? Front page news about some chick who kissed Simon Cowell when they were 9 years old….WOW she lives in Petaluma….I can already see the writers huddle dialogue:

“Ok guys this is our BIG CHANCE at nationwide exposure. Douchebag 1, you take Douchebag 2 with you and try to FIND this broad in Petaluma….This could be the big one people…”

There’s nothing wrong with stories every now and then that are of a humorous nature. But when you continue to cover that “story” for multiple days, then you become a half assed gossip rag.

It’s bad enough that Chris Smith thinks he’s like the poor man’s Garrison Keillor and ATTEMPTS to write in a romanticizing way about “Gool Ol Shanta Rosha”. Now we got the rest of the staff wanting to be TMZ reporters.

Meh….Anywho, happy Friday!

Weekend Warriors

Yuppies are funny. Let me explain.

After this story in The PD about a buncha yups taking a weekend cooking course from an “authentic Mexican”, I felt the need to post on it. But then I forgot. I was gonna just move on, but some things just gotta be said.

My disgrutledness (I just made up a new word!) comes from many years of observation living in Roseland. I remember driving by taco trucks on a warm spring evening, and seeing a bunch of people in khaki shorts and Burkenstocks running for Volvos after receiving their food. Or worse yet, if I was at said truck, I’d overhear the conversation: “Oh honey, this area is sewwww VIBRANT and CULTURAL! Let’s order some carnee ass-ada…That sounds adventurous!”. Yet, you see these are the same folks that lock their car doors or cross the street when they see a person of color approaching and write scathing anti-immigrant comments on the PD website any time an ethinic name pops up in a story.

Basically this is their outlook on things:

* We love your food, just don’t live by us

* We love your music, just don’t date our daughter

* We love wine, just not the people who bring it to the table

etc. etc. etc.

I’m sure some day, Roseland will experience gentrification as many other areas in the Bay Area have. High priced condos will force out those who have lived there for years because they can’t afford it anymore and there will be “California Fusion” taquerias every 2 blocks. It’s an ugly thought but hey, such is life I guess.

Hey D-Bags…It’s NOT ELVIS

Yesterday there was a big ceremony at the Charles M. Schulz airport for the new flights from Santa Rosa to Las Vegas. Personally, I think it’s GREAT. Although the plane that Horizon is flying looks like it was built by the Wright Brothers.

Gotta love the “in depth coverage” that the PD provided. Including 10 pictures ALL of a fake Elvis (as if that’s really necessary) in various poses. The guy isn’t a celebrity folks. He’s one of 5,000 impersonators from LV and far from the best judging by the pics. Don’t get TOO starstruck!

The Kids Are Alright

Wow score one for the youth of today eh? A bunch of teenagers have now persuaded the Hippy Commune er, I mean City Council of Sebastopol to reconsider the FREE Wifi offered by Sonic Net. They pointed out that their city is already the butt of many jokes around the country and to quote: “Do we really want a reputation as the tin-foil-hat-carrying city of Sebastopol? I don’t.”

To the parents of these brave kids, I give a warning: Watch your cars for key marks!

Put Away The Prozac!

Happy Friday people! No being a sourpuss today. I even surprise myself sometimes because it’s sort of difficult to be in a bad mood with such AWESOME weather. The smell of flowers blooming, sounds of birds chirping and the feel of warm sunshine.

Too bad I’m an introvert that runs from my car to my house like I’m under heavy artillery gunfire…

Either way, have a great day!

Did YEWWW Feel It?

Yeah so there was a 2.9 scale earthquake last night and it was near where I live. Of course, the Press Democrat made an article asking “Did YOU Feel It?”. Gimme a fuckin’ BREAK. The responses are hilarious because the people act like half assed reporters. And I’m sure it was the big talk of the morning on KZST. “Call in and tell us what YEWWW felt”. Happens every time after an earthquake no matter WHAT the magnitude.

Typical caller: ” Uhm yes, I live in Oakmont and I was eating lunch at 5:20am when ‘it’ hit….My wife Gertrude and I were ASTOUNDED and had to calm our 8 cats during the aftermath”.

Ahhh Sew Kew…I love to hate ya sometimes!

On a side note, I apologize for the lack of updates this past week. Back on the ball now so stay tuned!

Si Se Puede…

I’m all for immigrants. Hell, I live in Sonoma County…A place that wouldn’t EXIST without the hard working people that make it thrive. But I also am “all for” some other things.

When my grandmother was born here in the U.S., her mother (an Italian immigrant) went out of her way to learn English. She may not have been a pro, but she understood that was the lay of the land. When my grandmother was at school she spoke English, and at home spoke both Italian and English. They didn’t have any resources available (like English classes that are offered for free now) but they still made the effort. Is that too much to ask? Why should public servants have to learn 2 languages and why should people who ARE bilingual get paid more than someone who just speaks English? If I moved to Germany I would assume that I would have to learn German…Plain and simple.

The argument that “California used to be part of Mexico” is SUCH a cop out. Yes, lands were conquered and boundaries were changed, but shit happens. Fact is, countries and continents were made what they are through war and bloodshed. We can’t change history. And no one who is alive today was part of this “Old Mexico”. Since the U.S. was pillaged from the Native Americans, should we all start speaking THEIR language? Get over it already. I don’t see people whose homeland was taken over by the Romans hundreds of years ago trying to get reparations now. They moved on and so should we.

The other issue is health care. In some areas, over 50% of people going to hospital emergency rooms are uninsured. Since hospitals are forbidden to turn patients away, every child who is born to an illegal immigrant gets paid for by us…The tax payer. When my grandmother was recently hospitalized, her bill was for over $60,000 and it was less than a week long stay. Luckily her insurance covered it. But health care costs are what they are because of the uninsured that the hospitals MUST treat. However, there are also many others of different nationalities that pop out kids like it’s a fuckin’ contest, so I’m not placing sole blame on the immigrant population.

I was born and raised in Roseland. And from my experience, the majority of immigrants who lived in my neighborhood were hard working, honest people. Most just want a better life for their families and I can’t blame them. But there needs to be some SERIOUS reform to immigration policy. Otherwise we’re screwed. I don’t have a solution, but isn’t that what we pay public officials for?