WHOAH!!!

Holy crap this still exists?!?!?! I thought I dreamt it up!! Oh well I guess I better start making posts again!!…..as of…….TOMORROW

Moms Only Sucka!

I’d be lying if I said this story didn’t piss me off. For those unfamiliar with what I’m talking about, some dad in Santa Rosa tried to join a “Sonoma County Moms” internet forum and was flamed for it. Who knew moms could be so mean?

I guess it’s been a safe haven for people with vaginas and sore teets to talk about “issues”, schedule play dates and bitch about men. Now God FORBID a man wanted to infiltrate it ?! Personally I wouldn’t want to post in a place any LESS than this sewage tank. Nonetheless, this guy shouldn’t have been ridiculed by the moms for wanting to communicate with other stay at home parents. Oh poor you! Getting to sit at home on your fat ass, raise your children and fantasize about the pool boy while your husband supports you. And now this penis monster wants to talk baby food and parenting with you….whaaaaaaaaaaaah. Go get a latte and shut the fuck up.

As far as the dude goes, I have no idea why he would even WANT to join these miserable beings, but to each his own. Here’s a tip buddy, go join menarebetterthanwomen.com . Hell, even they allow women to join. Maybe the mom nazis could do the same, but then again that would be too fair and practical.

Multi-Slouchin’

Wow I’d like to say I’ve been busy doin’ stuff but I can’t lie to my loyal readers. I could have updated many times in the past couple of weeks, but I just found other shit to do. Not that there were a lack of topics.

We had Cinco De Mayo, the 1,019th immigration rally, Sebastopol City Council “scandal” etc. etc. etc. I just wasn’t on the ball. And for that people I apologize.

I will ATTEMPT to stop slothing it up and bring some insight to subjects as I should.

On that note, I got somethin’ to do so I’ll hafta tackle this whole blog debacle later =)

Weekend Warriors

Yuppies are funny. Let me explain.

After this story in The PD about a buncha yups taking a weekend cooking course from an “authentic Mexican”, I felt the need to post on it. But then I forgot. I was gonna just move on, but some things just gotta be said.

My disgrutledness (I just made up a new word!) comes from many years of observation living in Roseland. I remember driving by taco trucks on a warm spring evening, and seeing a bunch of people in khaki shorts and Burkenstocks running for Volvos after receiving their food. Or worse yet, if I was at said truck, I’d overhear the conversation: “Oh honey, this area is sewwww VIBRANT and CULTURAL! Let’s order some carnee ass-ada…That sounds adventurous!”. Yet, you see these are the same folks that lock their car doors or cross the street when they see a person of color approaching and write scathing anti-immigrant comments on the PD website any time an ethinic name pops up in a story.

Basically this is their outlook on things:

* We love your food, just don’t live by us

* We love your music, just don’t date our daughter

* We love wine, just not the people who bring it to the table

etc. etc. etc.

I’m sure some day, Roseland will experience gentrification as many other areas in the Bay Area have. High priced condos will force out those who have lived there for years because they can’t afford it anymore and there will be “California Fusion” taquerias every 2 blocks. It’s an ugly thought but hey, such is life I guess.

Put Away The Prozac!

Happy Friday people! No being a sourpuss today. I even surprise myself sometimes because it’s sort of difficult to be in a bad mood with such AWESOME weather. The smell of flowers blooming, sounds of birds chirping and the feel of warm sunshine.

Too bad I’m an introvert that runs from my car to my house like I’m under heavy artillery gunfire…

Either way, have a great day!

On A Random Note…

If I hear one more person tell me that things like chicken and ranch dressing are “good on pizza”, I’m gonna cut my fucking tongue out. (And saying it in the comments doesn’t count ya jerks). What are you, 3 years old?!?! Maybe next time ask the pizzeria you’re at if they can put some Cap’n Crunch on the pie. Then again, I dunno if Lil Ceasars will honor special requests.

More updates later

Bring Back Beebout!!!

Ok, usually I’m the FIRST one to complain about our local “media”. The Press Democrat seems to be run by highschool journalism students and KSRO is just awful for the most part. But I’ll save that whole bag of worms for another day.

I friggin LOVED the KFTY evening news. It was SUCH a trainwreck that I looked forward to watching it like no other newscast. First of all if you read the credits, it seems poor Ed Beebout was doing EVERYTHING on the show. Produced By: Ed Beebout – Edited By: Ed Beebout – Camera By: Ed Beebout. Yeah I’m taking it a little far but you get the drift. Then again, this guy had been on the station since the mid 80’s ATLEAST so no one was gonna steal his thunder. Either that or they just didn’t have the money to pay multiple people for multiple jobs.

In any event, it was always a hoot to see Ed flub the lines almost every time, the camera point at the wrong newscaster or the sound not being turned on and them not noticing. Endless entertainment. I honestly am a self confessed Beebout-a-holic.

KFTY now is just an endless parade of second run TV shows and reruns and I, my friends, am disgusted by it. Bring back tha muthafuckin NEWS! I’m sure Ed would jump at the chance to come back, and I highly doubt any of the others are doing many productive things these days. Hell, they even have a success story with weatherman Bill Martin who is now doin his gangsta lean on Channel 2. Dreams come true guys!!! GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT! And what we want is a local newscast where the set hasn’t changed since 1986. Kinda like Price Is Right. You don’t mess with perfection.

About The Site

Welcome to Sew Kew!!! I say that tongue-in-cheek of course. Somewhere along the line we in Sonoma County found ourselves cool enough to refer to the region as “So Co”….Don’t ask me when or where but it happened.  Although I was born and raised in this area, I recently had the pleasure of living elsewhere for a couple of years. An area with a MUCH wealthier population but which had half of the snootiness. Now that I’m back, I realize that this area has turned into a clusterfuck of fusion restaurants, wine snobs and people driving cars that they can’t REALLY afford. So hence the blog. I plan on covering both good and bad aspects of our wonderful whine cuntry but at this point to be honest, ranting seems to come the easiest. If you would like to contribute just let me know!